by Tamar Love
The very best part of going on vacation is having a vacation romance. If you
are solo, you might find a new friend. If you are married or part of a
couple, you might infuse your relationship with a little fire. Either way,
consider taking a break from your normal routine and getting naughty in a
"forbidden" place.
We don't mean that you should strip down on Main Street and do it in full
view of the neighbors -- please, don't break any laws! However, we present
the following ideas for your consideration...
1. In the Car
If you can't get away with a week-long vacation, take a one-night holiday
anyone can afford. Get a sitter for the kids or the dogs, and hop in the
car. Find a secluded spot at the drive-in, on lover's lane or on a deserted
highway, and steam up the windows like you did when you were a teenager.
You'll have a wickedly delightful time and appreciate your bed even more
when you return home. Caution: do not try this in a Ford Fiesta.
What You'll Need: Sexy music, candles and a blanket.
2. While Shopping
Okay, so a day of shopping may not be the vacation of your dreams, but you
may as well make the most of it. Instead of leaving the fitting room to
model your latest clothing find, invite your sweetie in for a "private
viewing." You'll both get a thrill from your proximity to the public -- just
don't get caught! We really can't think of anything more embarrassing than
being caught in a compromising position by a store clerk.
3. At the Movies
Don't have sex at the movies! Besides being really gross, it's a nuisance
for others. However, we do recommend a little stealth action during a
romantic thriller. Try using a remote-controlled toy for a little
clandestine fun
-- just pick a loud movie or
your experience won't be so secret!
What You'll Need:
Remote-controlled toy
& extra batteries
4. The Mile-High Club
Having never successfully completed this maneuver, we can only tell you what
not to do: don't expect to fit more than a combined 400 pounds of
flesh into the lavatory, don't expect your experience to look
anything like it does in the movies, and don't expect that anyone
will not know what you are doing in there. Instead of trying to do
the deed in a tiny, stinky place, consider alleviating your boredom on a
long flight with a little under-the-blanket friskiness. There's no need to
get carried away, but you can easily let your fingers do the walking without
getting into too much trouble!
What You'll Need: Noseplugs -- or an airline blanket
5. In the Woods
If you and your sweetie are taking a hike, picnicking or camping, try doing
it in the woods. The green canopy will shield you from the sun, the forest
floor will cushion your backsides and the fresh air will leave you
invigorated and ready for round two. Find a spot off the beaten path, spread
out a blanket and get friendly. Just remember: "leaflets three, let it be."
There are some places you do not want poison oak or ivy!
What You'll Need:
Afterglow Toy Tissues,
a blanket and calamine lotion (just in case).
6. In the Swimming Pool or Hot Tub
The cardinal rule of having sex under water is lube, lube and more lube.
Contrary to what you might expect from a body of slippery, wet water, the
chlorine and heat in a swimming pool or hot tub dries out the body's natural
lubricant, making sex raspy and uncomfortable. If you're taking a dip into
"forbidden waters," bring along a bottle of silicone lubricant --
water-based lubes wash right off. For bonus points, invest in a waterproof
toy, book and game to enrich and eroticize the experience.
What You'll Need:
Silicone-based lubricant
and a waterproof
toy.
7. On the Beach
Here's the deal with sex on the beach: it's really, really, really sandy.
You might be better off with the cocktail of the same name. However, if you
must... bring along two large sheets or blankets, one for under and one for
over the two of you. If you do it during the day, wear sunscreen and be
prepared for some strange looks (you'll get fewer weird looks if you opt for
a nude beach). If you opt for an evening adventure, bring a sweater to fend
off chilly ocean breezes. In either case, make sure you have a handful of
Pleasure Wipes for cleanup, and try not to rub the sand in when
you're cleaning up.
What You'll Need: Two blankets or sheets, sunscreen,
Pleasure Wipes
and some genital-friendly lotion to soothe your sandburn
8. Under a Waterfall on a Tropical Island
Yeah, like any of us are gonna be doing this any time soon. But if
you can swing it, you'll never forget it.
What You'll Need: Lots of money
In general, remember that sex on vacation is supposed to be fun. If you are
part of a couple, enliven the experience with new locales or props (candles,
toys or visual aides). If you are vacationing solo and looking for a fling,
don't bring unreasonable expectations to the experience. In most cases, the
romance ends when your vacation does.
Finally, don't forget to be safe. If you're having a summer fling, you
absolutely must use a condom for oral, anal or vaginal sex. Most important:
don't break any laws. We cannot stress this enough. Use good
common sense and observe all local ordinances, or your summer adventure can
easily turn into a nightmare -- and give you a police record!
That said, go have fun in the sun!
